On my way to Utah!!

I hate airports, well, they aren’t so bad, and flying isn’t so bad, but it’s so hard to just fly. I have to unpack my carry-on and strip down before I can get through security. Sometimes I think it would be easier to just come to the airport naked and get dressed after I get to the gate. It would be uncomfortable if I was late to my flight and had to fly in the nude, but they still offer blankets don’t they? So I think that I’ve striped down far enough, I took my laptop out of my bag and out of it’s case and it’s gone through the “scanner” and then I’m standing there in line behind space cadet who is just staring out the window! Move it buddy, my stuff isn’t at my side so I might have a coronary if we don’t reunite soon. So the guy finally goes through, beeps and gets put in a glass box. That looked promising, I’m not nervous now. So the guy on the other side of the metal detector is giving me mixed signals. He’s not looking at me, but his palm is faced out at me like “stop” and then he looks and motions for me to come forward but midway he seems to say stop, so I’m going crazy and am super timid as though the detector is going to zap me if I don’t get this right. I get through and it’s beeped at me. The guy says, “Do you have a belt on?”

“Oh yeah.” So instead of pulling out the wand he makes me go back through, in order to do this I have to ditch the belt. So I grab an individual tub for one little belt, cut in front of people and put it on their belt to go through the inspector, then I get in the ever increasing line and watch as my stuff heads off to lost and found because it’s been sitting there so long. Flip Flopper does the same thing when my turn comes up for the metal detector and I close my eyes as I go through because I have some strange neurotic tendencies. I’m given the okay to proceed to my belongings where I can repack and get dressed. I grab the belt, stuff it in my bag, zip my laptop in its case, stuff that in my bag, grab my purse, carrying on bag and shoes and go to a bench to collect myself. As I am putting my shoes on I look across the room to see that the man who was put in the glass box has been taken to another glass room (and when I say ‘glass’ I mean Plexiglas, harder to break out of). He’s sitting down while they inspect him with the wand (I always thought you had to stand for that). I thank my lucky stars they didn’t put me on display and head out to my gate.

Now I sit here, as people fill in around me, some have a little laptop envy and wished they had either brought theirs or owned one. I have my stuff in the seat next to me because I hate the idea of strangers, blame the childhood on that one. Which just reminded me to plug into the laptop so that I can listen to what I want and seem less inviting.

Per bad experiences from before I have within my carry on two packs of crackers, some starbursts, and my remaining Reese’s pieces from the beginning of the month (my last travel engagement). The last time I flew I went an entire day without any food because the money leeches charge for lunch, are skimpy on the beverages, and have no guilt about passing you up for some crackers if you’re asleep. And I hate falling asleep on airplanes because I wake up dry, inside and out. My eyes hurt to move because I was too afraid to bring contact solution because I’m not 100% sure what 3oz. is, plus it’s not in a clear bottle and I don’t have the appropriate sized bag to place them in. My throat is dry because apparently while I was asleep they came around with the beverage cart, and I should be so lucky to snag a pack of crackers. So I took care of as much as I could, which couldn’t include liquids so pretty much I just brought my own crackers, starbursts will cause me to salivate, thus taking care of the dry throat, and the Reese’s pieces are just because I like peanut butter.

It wouldn’t be nearly as bad if I had fallen asleep before midnight last night and didn’t wake up at three. Instead I feel like I have to crack my neck and at any moment I could go into a REM cycle. Oh, and any takers on me sitting next to a good looking guy this flight, because I’m pretty sure I look like regurgitated food today.
I can’t help but feel like I’m forgetting something, and at the same time, I’ve got to tell myself I can’t do anything about it, so just forget it.

Oh, young hot pilot! This flight just got a little better.

Virginia is for Gangstas...Holla!

So my friend and I were talking this morning in my workstation. Last night my boss set up a "Virginia is for Lovers" bumper sticker near my personal effects. So my friend read it and then she remembered hearing about Virginia's new promotional campaign that used a new hand gesture to make a heart. It was an awkward hand gesture if you ask me, the thumbs pushed together and the pointer fingers curving to make a heart, but all the other fingers up in the air, like so...

It's not too unlike the way friendly members of Gangster Disciples like to say 'hello' to each other, like so...

Their faces have been blotted out because they aren't models paid by the Virginia tourism department, they are actual gangsta youth, spreading the message of gangsta love.

My favorite part in the article (that is attached below) was when the president of the state tourism marketer, Alisa Bailey said, “We are taking this seriously, but just because someone in another culture uses the symbol inappropriately or for some other reason, I find it almost offensive that we would change our campaign.”
Offensive, possibly, but I think the public would be more offended that their state tourism decided to try to get them hooked on a gang symbol. I don’t agree with gangs, but I don’t think you should equip the public with an easy way to get killed either.
You never know when a Virginian might be on the shady streets of Chicago and decide to jokingly do the ‘Virginia is for Lovers’ gang sign and unknowingly be within the visual range of a member of the Gangster Disciples.
Oh and my other favorite part was when it stated that they thought the gang was limited to South Carolina, because things that happen in Virginia never get noticed in South Carolina. A gang symbol by any other name would still get you shot. State tourism should never try to make any hand gesture a part of their marketing campaign. Whether used by gang members or teenagers (young adults in my social circle) hand gestures are rarely ever a good thing.


http://hamptonroads.com/node/312491

Punch Lists

So my project today at work was to type up the “Punch lists” into a spreadsheet. A punch list, for those of you who don’t know, is like a filling out a list of problems when you first move into an apartment or a rental house. Pretty much you are stating what damages were there before so you don’t get in trouble when they are still there at the end. But our punch list isn’t only that, it’s to fix as many damages as we can. In no way is a punch list to be mistaken with a wish list. Today I had 16 punch lists to enter into our spreadsheet so that we can be organized and stay on top of things. From these 16 punch lists I have chosen my 6 top things that I will never forgive them for writing down.

Number 6: “A plant for the corner next to my credenza.” I’m not even going to give commentary on this one.
Number 5: “Small.” I’m assuming this person was referring to the size of her workstation and how she is not happy with it. My response, we can always leave you in the old building (which is where I am still at for one more day) or the other advice I’ll freely give, downsize.
Number 4: “Need keys to my desk.” This was from one of the managers. If this particular manager had ready any of the e-mails involving the move he would have known that he, and he alone was responsible for those keys. This is what we call an SOL situation.
Number 3: “I don’t like my cube, it is too open, a lot of noise, winds, airy, people walk by, noise disturbs my work. Please relocate me to another quiet corner cube.” First off, your manager, not HR, placed you in that cube, talk to him first. Secondly, there are seriously winds disturbing your work? We are inside.
Number 2: “I would like my air conditioning cut off, it makes a lot of unpleasant noise giving me a terrible headache. Can’t sleep at night.” That last part sounds like a personal problem. Also, if we cut off the AC in that part of the building you’re going to be getting many more unpleasant noises, that of the 20 other people in your department complaining about how warm it is.
Number 1: “Lights do not stay on in office.” To the unknowing person this seems like an electrical problem. But the truth of it is, we have an even bigger problem here, it’s called management, because the lights will turn on when you enter the room and they will stay on, unless there is a long period of inactivity. Way to rat yourself out.

Other than that we had 8 “wish list” items. Just in case you’re trying to do the math, some people put more than one “complaint” on a punch list. Out of 28 issues I have recorded (from the 16 punch list) 11 of them were actual issues that we were looking for and hopefully are the only ones we’ll attend to, because honestly these people are ridiculous and while I’m excited to get to the new building I am not excited to see many of those people, because I’ve got my own “punch list” and it just keeps growing.

Entrepreneur

FREE SNACKS

As I have said before, we are moving buildings. All week I've been walking around the office and cleaning up the mess people left behind. It reminds me a lot of being the last one to leave for the summer during college. All the crap no one wanted so they just left it for the poor sucker who stayed until the end. I had it happen to me once or twice and after that made sure I wasn't the last one out of the apartment, and I can't honestly say that I've never done it to anyone either. It can be easy.

Anyway, along with that we are also slowly losing the things that make an office run. The first thing to go was the ice machine, and believe it or not we did have member of our office throw a big fit about that. I was saddened about not having ice, but I always knew I could bring some from home, so I didn't cry about it like this one person did. Along with the ice machine we lost our plants, they are all over at the new building now. Our extra source of oxygen, gone, just like that. Today it was the vending machines turn to kick the bucket and be dragged out of the office. It's again, no big deal to me, I don't even buy stuff from the vending machine. But my boss decided to ease everyone else into the transition she would buy them snacks and drinks and give them away for free. Not if I have anything to do with it.

Bosslady gave me a box I could use as my money box. I told her that I didn't remember what club I was in during middle school, but I was in charge of the concession stand at the baseball games and I did a pretty good job. So I set up the table and my money box and took a seat. The paper at the bottom of the box would be the pleasant accounting department's printed copy of the e-mail stating that the snacks were free. If you look closely you can see that "free snacks" is highlighted. You can also see that I said tips were welcome. And yes, most people noticed my Peanuts reference on the box.

So I finally got bored and asked my boss if I had to man my station. She said I could go back to my desk, which I did. But a while later I went in to collect my free snack and checked out the box and this is what I saw!

Someone was kind enough to humor me and drop in $1.15 into my little tip box. Now the question is, when I get back after lunch will it all still be there? If so I think I'll take it for safe keeping and put the box out again tomorrow...just to see how much money I can get out of these people!

I'm back!

This has been the longest week of my life. I haven’t done anything differently, it is just dragging. I’m dying here, I can’t believe that it is only Thursday. Maybe it’s because I have tickets to see Batman Friday night, or maybe it’s because in two weeks I’m going to Utah. But for the past 7 months time has been flying and suddenly it comes to a screeching halt this week.
I went to Michigan the weekend of July 4th to go and see my dad’s side of the family.

Road Trip!

Kathryn and I finger dancing in the car.

It was fun. Normally when we go to Michigan we hang out with Uncle Ken and Aunt Sue and their son Scottie, occasionally their daughter Christy makes an appearance, like two summers ago when she took us to Cedar point and I got the worst sun burn ever. I thought I had more time to get that sunscreen on, but I rode two roller coasters (I’m not a roller coaster kind of person). Anyway, back to this year.

Watching the snake (not a real one, it's a firework type thing).

But this year there was a big Fourth of July party at my Aunt’s house. Everyone in Michigan has big yards, even if they are “small” in comparison to some of the yards they are all much bigger than any yard I’ve seen in Richmond, unless I was on a farm, which I haven’t done often. She has a pond in the backyard that they made and they treat it so all the kids were swimming and we had a big cookout. And when I say big we are talking about a huge family who shares the same weakness for sweet confections that I do. So the dessert table was almost as big as the dinner table and that was pretty big. We got there around 11 am and stayed until at least 10 pm and I don’t think we stopped eating. It was easy, you stand too close to the tables and you find yourself with another hamburger in hand, or another one of my aunt’s amazing snickerdoodles. I have to admit though; it was weird being with all my cousins because I don’t really know them. They all live up there together and my dad is the only one who lives far away, so they definitely have the advantage. But I was picking up on names and doing pretty good for myself I think. Of course all my cousins my age were either married or had children (yes, that’s an either/or statement). So I didn’t feel like my “group” was there. If that makes sense. There were those there that were my age, but there weren’t many I had anything in common with. So I tended to hang out with Mike and Kathryn a lot, or with some of my older cousins.

Sandbag toss with Mike

My dad with his family! 4 brothers and 5 sisters and his dad. (Uncle Ronnie is a paper plate next to my dad this year...but we've all been paper plates at some point in our lives)

In other news, we are moving buildings at work. Last Friday all the underwriters in the company and their managers were all packed up and ready to go. Monday morning there were only about 40 or so of us left in the building. Going from 160 to 40 is quite the difference. The office is quiet, but it’s not like it was loud before. I barely notice they are gone except that not as many people are coming over to my workstation complaining about things. The best part is, external calls can’t make it through to us so I don’t have to worry about my phone ringing. We do have to check our voicemail periodically just to make sure we aren’t missing anything important, but every time I check I have nothing, which is a relief, but it’s also depressing and I told my boss so. She laughed and said I’ll have plenty to deal with at the new building so just enjoy it….great.
Monday morning when we came in Wanda (Payroll) and I walked around the building, checking to see what was left behind and cleaning up a bit. Since no one was around I hopped on some dolly’s that were stacked up and rode it around like the Flintstones mobile. Yes, I got a picture, who wouldn’t?

Yesterday was pretty funny though because Wanda and I went upstairs to get more crates, and we have to take the elevator down (duh) with those. So I get in the elevator and she starts to push the crates in but the wheel on the dolly gets stuck and suddenly the doors are closing and I don't react because I figure that they will hit the crates and open again. Not the case, they push the crates back towards Wanda and I look at her just before the door closes all the way and I start cracking up. It was the funniest thing to me! Probably because the look of surprise on her face. She said that on her side the inner door pushed her out slightly, but the outer door didn't close all the way and she panicked that she was going to have to go tell our boss that I was stuck in the elevator. I finally get my senses and hit the third floor button so the doors will open again and we get her and the crates into the elevator. I was laughing so hard that I had tears streaming down my face. When my boss saw us she got really worried that I had been hurt and then she asked if Julie hit me (mostly because Julie does hit me...not in a mean way, but seriously, I bruise easily). So we told her the story...and she may not have been following, or maybe this story is one of those where you had to be there. But you are reading the blog of a girl who went hysterical during math class because everytime the teacher drew one of the math equations it looked like a little football shaped smiley face...no one else thought that was quite as funny either.