Monday, February 24, 2014

Dude, is my face okay? I think you melted it off. *

I was talking with a friend the other night and one of my old theories came to mind.  When I say old, we are talking several years, back when I used to be funny and creative and my mind came up with quirky nonsense and yet, I could almost make that nonsense make sense.  My friend had actually read it, a theory I developed and wrote about in 2008.  I have known my friend since maybe 2012?  It was another friend that pointed out that this meant some serious creeping occurred.  I mean, that's 6 years ago people (it's 6 right? math has never been my strong suit).  I mean, I'm flattered of course.  I have friends who read my blog and I never even knew it (and/or Facebook notes that should be buried deep down underneath years of status updates).

The theory you ask? Dating and Baking.
Original release date: June 30, 2008
Original Post: http://sixthdonbro.blogspot.com/2008/06/bake-for-9-to-10-years-aka-and-its-more.html

In my memory, this theory was pure genius.  Reading over it, there are some changes I would make.  I mean, at the original release date I hadn't even had a boyfriend.  Dates - yes.  Unrequited love - did Noah have enough water for the flood? 

The first thing I would change is the fact that I used "weather" instead of "whether" - that embarrasses me for some reason.  I would hate to think people thought I was ignant 6 years ago.  So below is the revised theory/advice column.  Take it with a grain of salt (no pun intended - well, actually, yes, yes it was).

Dating and baking – revised


It has been 6 years since I came up with my theory on the similarities between dating and baking. There are many things I would keep the same.

Preheat the oven – In order for dating to even occur, there has to be the attraction. Granted – attraction doesn’t have to go both ways, but if neither side is attracted to other, then no bueno. No attraction = no dates. Preheating the oven/attraction includes shallow physical attraction, sense of humor, common interests/causes, etc.

However –preheating to the RIGHT temperature is attraction from both sides. If it’s one side (unrequited) it’s as though you are placing dough in a broken oven and wasting your time sitting around for it to finish.

So you’ve made it to the working oven that has preheated to the proper temperature. There’s friendly banter, constant flirting, maybe even a date or two. Next, you have timing. How long is it going to take for true feelings to come out or for a relationship to finally start materializing? There are the anxious bakers; the ones that shout it out right away, but that’s like taking a cake out of the oven prematurely, it falls/fails. Then there are those that put everything in the oven, close the door and forget they’ve got a cake in there! There are people who flirt and are friendly but they’ve lost track of time or don’t even know how long it should be left in the oven to begin with.

I think in the baking sense, we all know what happens to something left in the oven at 350 degrees for too long. It burns. People are the same way….it’s why we don’t put them in an oven to begin with. …But with dating, eventually, weeks, months, or years of waiting burns away the feelings that person had for the other. They may even get angry about being forgotten there, but hopefully they just move on the greener pastures.

There are other essential things with baking, like ingredients. The ingredients make the person. You don’t leave out certain ingredients in baking, so there are certain things you don’t leave out in the person you desire to date. Ingredients like the egg or the baking soda, you can’t experiment with these. The real life equivalent to these depends on your standards. For some it’s a shared religion or values. Without these essential items (these “must haves”) what you are baking will not turn out right. Please keep in mind, essentials do not include hair color, body type, an interest in aquatic animal anatomy – these will be addressed later. What I mean here are things that are most essential for this to blossom into a healthy relationship. Without these, things could be looking like they are developing smoothly, but when you pull the cookies out of the oven, it is obvious to the taste that something is missing. Some people will continue to eat these cookies that don’t taste right (like some people will stay in a relationship they no longer care about or know is not good for them), but most will throw the cookie out and start over.

The other aspects of dating, I mean baking, are okay to experiment with, like choosing different baking chips to put in place of chocolate chips. The different chips could represent different personalities, hair colors, body types, sense of humor,insert your random, weird interest you may actually expect to find a ‘soul mate’ in (cue aquatic animal anatomy), etc.

Originally I gave advice to the bakers and the baked goods, one representing men and one women. However, I think we can all simultaneously be the baker and the baked and even if not simultaneously, we could be one or the other at any given time. So when you find yourself the baker, watch the temperature and the timer and don’t be reckless in the kitchen. Remember, if you no longer want the baked good, someone else might – so don’t be selfish and let it burn in the oven. When you’re the baked good don’t let someone leave you in the oven too long, know when to bear the heat and when to get out of the oven.

But always keep trying – it will pay off some day and the rewards are sweet.


No – sweeter.

Of course, same disclaimer, maybe you shouldn’t take dating advice from someone who thinks it’s okay to compare dating to baking.

Friday, February 21, 2014

I'm just jazzed about being on the show.*

Today my first post for LeapBooks published.  Yay!

Check it out here:
http://leapbks.blogspot.com/2014/02/five-on-friday-readingjunky.html

In other news - uh....I get married in 21 days! WTM!?  I am sure glad I delegated everything to family because there's no way I could pull everything together in such a short amount of time.

For those of you who sent me their addresses for announcements - they are coming....I am slow.

Tuesday, February 11, 2014

Did you just cross off my name? That seems premature.*

We are supposedly getting a lot of snow in the next day or two.  Don't get me wrong, we've gotten snow in the past but it just hasn't been a whole lot.  Not as much as they predict at least.  A few weeks ago we were supposed to get a lot and it was supposed to start around lunch time.  My boss told me that she was going in to a meeting but that if it started I shouldn't just sit and wonder if I should go, I should just go.

It started to snow around lunch time and I found myself staring out the window wondering if it would continue to come down in these large flakes or if maybe it would stop.  Then I realized I was doing exactly what my boss told me not to do - I sat wondering if I should go or not.  So I packed up my stuff, sent her an email letting her know I was leaving and left.

Not even an hour later I found myself looking out a window at a snowless sky. All evidence of the earlier "snow storm" had disappeared.  So I sent my boss a text and told her I was coming back.

Granted, it began to snow that night, but it really wasn't all that much, at least not in my area.  So since then I have been a little bitter and cynical.  I just want a good snow storm, one where I don't lose power but I can curl up in front of a space heater and watch some period piece movies. 

I digress - so they predict a pretty intense snow storm starting tomorrow.  People are talking about whether or not we will have work on Thursday and I am of course, cynical about it.  But that's mostly to not get my hopes up.  Anyway - funny story.

This lady was talking to my coworker and I about the snow and she said, "As long as I have dog food I have plenty to eat".  This struck me as odd and maybe a little sad but no one else seemed to notice, so before she walked away I asked her to clarify this sentence.  I'm happy to report that she meant for there to be a pause, she just wants to make sure she has dog food, because SHE has plenty to eat....so her dogs would just need something.  MUCH better!  I was getting ready to take her to the store and get her some food.

The other thing making me smile today - on Sunday I did some photography homework, one assignment was to take a panning shot.  Where you photograph an object that is moving quickly so they are clear and the background is blurry.  I had to take the shot a few times to get a good one and my niece would only do one before she turned all prima donna on us so my wonderful, agile, fun loving older sister stepped in and let me take the shot over and over.  Here's the winner:


Hope it made you smile too.

Wednesday, February 5, 2014

That's a lot of meat.*

I got the edited photo back from Katy - she kept talking about the picture with the telephone pole that looked like a cross - I haven't had the heart to tell her that the object of the photo is the nasty looking glove...one thing I have learned from writing, if people want to give you credit for being clever, just take it. 

Edited
Either way - I love the edit.  In case you need to see the original:
For hers - I couldn't decide on just one to edit.  I am trying to get the hang of Lightroom and I'm certain there's TONS I haven't even glimpsed.  So far now it's all very basic.

The left is the original and the right is the edited.



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