Monday, March 23, 2015

We Are All Made Of The Same Stuff

A few weeks ago we had New Beginnings.  It has been at least 14 years since I've participated in New Beginnings so I have to say I was more than ready to let everyone else take the lead and I figured I'd watch and help out more next year.  But that's not what callings are for.

For those of you who don't know what New Beginnings is, here is my simple and hopefully close to correct definition.  Each year, somewhere near the beginning, the Young Women put on a program to introduce the upcoming Beehives (girls turning 12 that year).  But the program isn't only about the new girls,  All the girls are asked to attend and parent's of all the girls are invited. We choose a theme and give mini talks.  Then we eat.

This year our theme was basically, "we are all a work in progress" or "under construction" - I honestly can't remember the official theme,  The girls wore hardhats and gave "tool talks" about each of the Young Women values (and they picked a tool to signify that value - i.e. blue prints, hammer,etc.).  Then - it was my turn to talk.  I was to give a 5-7 minutes talk on how we are all a work in progress.  I will admit, I stressed about this.  There isn't much already out there about this topic and I wanted to make sure I went along with the rest of the program without really understanding what the rest of the program would be.  I didn't know if I was near the beginning or the end (actually...I assumed beginning but I was at the end).

I want to share some of the thoughts I shared with the group (and some I didn't share).  I can't say I completely followed what I had written, which means I joked around a bit more because I do that when nervous and I hope it means the spirit spoke more than I did.

I started off with sharing a quote from President Uchtdorf.  He gave a talk in a Priesthood Session of conference entitled, "Four Titles" and one of the titles was "Son of God" (changed by me to "Daughter of God" for the evening).  He says,
"Compared to the perfection of God, we mortals are scarcely more than awkward, faltering toddlers.  But our loving Heavenly Father wants us to become more like Him, and...that should be our eternal goal too.  God understands that we get there not in an instant but by taking one step at a time.
I do not believe in a God who would set up rules and commandments only to wait for us to fail so He could punish us.  I believe in a Heavenly Father who is loving and caring and who rejoices in our every effort to stand tall and walk toward him.  Even when we stumble, He urges us not to be discouraged - never to give up or flee our allotted field of service - but to take courage, find our faith, and keep trying."
 Then I suggested that there were three versions of us coexisting each day of our lives.

  1. The person you used to be
  2. The person you are now
  3. The person you will become
Here's where I'll interject a bit more of a personal touch for the blog.  To better clarify this idea, I remember a time in my life when I felt so far away from God and from the person I thought I was, the person I wanted to be.  I never thought I would get back there, much less, to develop beyond to even better.  I was stuck with the person I had been, the one who had made mistakes and led me to that moment, and the person I was at the time because of those actions and consequences.  I can still remember a day only a few months after that when I realized how far I had come.  I read through an old journal entry and realized that in a matter of months I had completely changed (with supreme effort from the Lord and from myself).  In my moments of self pity and depression, I failed to see the third version of myself, and to understand that the person I am now is changing, sometimes as quickly as day to day.

For the girls I described the difference between being a helpless baby (completely dependent upon their parents) to the young women they are now.  How they can walk and feed themselves, how they can have conversations, how they can even take selfies now.  But I also shared with them that they don't have to look that far back to see the difference from a younger version to the present.  

I remember in a Sunday School lesson once, the teacher said "We are all made of the same stuff".  I can't remember exactly what the lesson was about, but this statement has helped me, especially when I still find myself comparing my qualities to others.  I used to look at others and the things I admired in them and felt as though I lacked the ability to ever get there.  They must have something that I don't.  Even at the beginning of the program that evening I couldn't stop comparing myself, a nervous wreck who had to look at her notes, to Annette, who wrote her talk a few minutes before and I don't believe looked down at her notes once.  Or Jen, much further along in pregnancy and yet she's always willing to give a talk or bake some goods, or run to the store to pick up decorations.  I feel so lazy compared to her.  While I can't stop the thoughts, I can remind myself, "We are all made of the same stuff".  It means I can be better than I am today, I have the same potential as everyone else.  If I see a quality I like in someone else, I can work on developing that in myself.  It's not about where someone else is in their progress, but about continuing to work on my own.

We all have the same basic building materials to start construction.  We have the same potential as the person next to us.  We are not finished products but we are under constant construction and it is a lifelong process.  We’ve been given everything we need; it is up to us how to use these materials.  It’s important to seek the Lord’s will since he has the blueprints for our best selves. 

C.S. Lewis gives an example of a living house.  He says: 
Imagine yourself as a living house. God comes in to rebuild that house. At first, perhaps, you can understand what He is doing. He is getting the drains right and stopping the leaks in the roof and so on; you knew that those jobs needed doing and so you are not surprised. But presently He starts knocking the house about in a way that hurts abominably and does not seem to make any sense. What on earth is He up to? The explanation is that He is building quite a different house from the one you thought of - throwing out a new wing here, putting on an extra floor there, running up towers, making courtyards. You thought you were being made into a decent little cottage: but He is building a palace. He intends to come and live in it Himself.”
It is important to remember that you are created in God’s image.  You are a daughter of God with divine potential and he has a plan for you.  Each week in our opening exercises we stand and recite our theme which begins, “We are daughters of our Heavenly Father who loves us and we love Him.”  This statement reminds us who we are and whose we are.  He is the master architect and if we trust in Him he will push us beyond a cottage and into a mansion.  

Thursday, March 5, 2015

Baby's Day Out

I had a doctor's appointment this morning, the infamous glucose test I've heard so much about.  My appointment was at 8, so Chewy and I showed up a few minutes early.  The doors to the office weren't even unlocked yet, I've never been there that early.  We checked in and went back for an ultrasound.  We had a new lady, well, one we haven't seen before.  Little man wouldn't cooperate for her so she wiggled the wand around on my belly and pushed down and begged baby boy to move so she could get the shot she wanted.  Chewy asked if there was some trick I had to get him to move.  I told him I hadn't figured out how to control our baby yet.

We got to see him as he experienced some hiccups though.  And she got a picture of his fist in the air.

More power to you baby.

At one point, he retaliated against the ultrasound lady....of course, I'm the one who felt it, and let me say, not pleasant.  She finally got what she wanted and Chewy and I cleaned up the goop and went over to the lab for my glucose drink.

I had heard from so many people that it was disgusting and to drink it fast.  Only one person had said it tasted good.  I had my choice of fruit punch and orange.  I went with the lesser of two evils (fruit punch).  The lady said, "you have five minutes to drink that."  So I untwisted the cap and threw it down the hatch.  I don't know if I was worried it would taste bad or if I'm incredibly competitive and saw "five minutes" as a challenge, but I'm willing to bet it was the former.  It tasted like HI-C and not revved up HI-C like was told, just what you would get if you got it as a fountain drink.

Then it was over to the doctor to be least favorite part.  I gave my usual sample and then Chewy and I sat in one of the rooms waiting.  The nurse came in to give me my "injection" - I think I would have preferred her to call it a shot.  A shot isn't so bad.  She stepped over to the counter with her back to me and I rolled up my sleeve.  I think I may have said, "This is the worst day ever" because after my "injection" I would be getting my blood taken.  To which she replied that at least this shot was in the butt.



...I unrolled my sleeve.  Out of all the things the people in that office have seen I'm not quite sure they've ever seen my butt.  I immediately felt the need to get off my butt so I stood.  She said I could lay on my side on the short little table or I could stand in front of it with my hands in front of me (not sure why that's a concern, maybe it's only natural to fight away a needle aimed for your butt).  I chose to stand as it seemed more comfortable.  I pulled down my pants and then I pulled them up again and verified that I was suppose to do that.  She said 'yes' and I said, "good, because I didn't want to make this awkward."  Chewy came over to hold my hand, for which I am grateful because let me tell you, that sucker burned!

The whole time I had no idea why I was getting the shot, I figured it was just routine, but as the lady was leaving she mentioned that she is "RH negative too" and she always had to get the shots.  I learned something new about myself.  Well, I really learned it when I Googled it after she left (gotta love smart phones).  All the things I am learning about myself because of this baby.

Doctor came in to talk to us for a bit about our baby and the results from the ultrasound.  Then he sent me to get my blood taken.  I was hungry,tired and I had just taken a shot to the butt.  In some ways, having my blood taken was nothing, in others, I worried all the above would combined and I would get sick.  But it wasn't bad.  I don't look, I don't think I could handle looking.  I just count random numbers and pray with my eyes closed.  When I was done we went to the waiting room and I ate some crackers.

When I got to work I tried swiping my ID badge to get the elevator to operate.  That's not how you do push a button.  Luckily I was alone and could laugh at myself rather than be embarrassed
And that's my day so far.  Just got word that work is closing early today because of our weekly inclement weather we've been having.  I mean, seriously, it's like every Thursday we are going to have snow or ice.  We haven't had youth night in three weeks now.  But who am I to complain, I get to go home and rest.

Friday, February 27, 2015

What not to say...

At work there are several pregnant women.  Three of us like to email each other when something has been said to us that we want to remember never to say to pregnant women.  These things are never meant in a mean spirited way but some of them can make you feel bad.

The first was, "Oh, you've popped!" Meant in kindness and excitement over the growing baby however it doesn’t leave the woman who has ‘popped’ feeling very good about herself.

Next from a doctor, “Proteins grow the baby, carbs grow you.”  Yes, yes, it came from a medical professional to my friend, but she wasn’t happy about it.  My sweet doctor doesn’t mention my weight, it’s proof that I have a very smart doctor.

The next we got wind of was, "I see you waddling over there."  Which I told to Chewy and he likes so he repeats it to me sometimes.

A few days ago I got my first one.  I was in my workstation talking to my coworker about something and a lady from downstairs stopped by and had me turn so she could see my pregnant belly (my pride and joy *sarcasm* I do not like looking this wide).  So I swiveled around and Vanna Whited my belly for her.  She smiled and then brought her hands up to her cheeks and made a squishing motion and said, “And your face is getting juicy."


Then I said, “Ohhhh, thank you, I’ve been waiting for someone to notice.”
At least when she left my coworker and I got a good laugh out of it.  So the tears that followed the statement were brought on by laughter instead of feeling I am bloating like Violet Beauregarde.  Of course, I emailed the pregnant ladies to tell them of the newest “what not to say”. 

In other news, people at work are beginning to notice my growing belly.  This sweet older man at work came up today to congratulate me.  I gave him kind of a blank stare at first because I am still unsure of how to react to the fact that people notice.  I pointed at my belly and said, “This?”  He laughed and said, “Yes, I was worried by the look on your face that maybe I had it wrong.”  I laughed too and said, “Yeah I am.  But it would be funny if I weren’t.  Thanks for congratulating me on gaining weight, it was nothing, just ate extras at every meal.”

And as long as I only look down at my belly (and don't catch a side view) it's not too bad.

Tuesday, February 24, 2015

Breaking News

Thank you to all our concerned readers.  Boyfriend was found last night in a Thirty-One Bag with a note (since he lacks vocal chords).  The note reads, "Don't leave me! I Love You!"

Monday, February 23, 2015

The case of the missing boyfriend

For my coworker’s birthday, she received a “Grow a boyfriend”

Just add water.

Since my boss has a fishless fish tank in her office we decided to pull a little prank and check her observation skills.  My coworker went in early and put the ‘boyfriend’ in the tank.

When boss lady went to the restroom, coworker ran in to stand him up.  Then there came the series of meetings in the boss’ office.  Each of us had to meet with her and I went last.  While in there I would steal glances at the fish tank but it appeared that boyfriend was missing.  I figured boss lady had already found him.  So after my meeting I checked with the others in my department but they each said that nothing had been noticed during their meeting.  We slipped in when boss lady wasn’t in there and checked but sure enough, he was gone.  We checked the trashcan and my coworker even dug around in the fish tank with a letter opener.  We finally told boss lady about boyfriend and asked if she had taken him out but she hadn’t.  No one knows what happened to him and it’s killing me.  I feel like our prank got turned around on us but  no is fessing up!

Have you seen this man?

We're beginning to think maybe he dissolved in the nasty fish tank water.  What a way to go.

Thursday, February 19, 2015

I'm the fire starter

I got my first real case of heartburn Wednesday night.  I tried drinking milk, eating ice cream, and going to bed to escape the discomfort but it followed me to sleep and woke me up throughout the night.  I felt like I was turning into a dragon and my lungs were filling with fire.  I worried I would incinerate anything I breathed on.  I narrowed it down to Papa John’s pizza since that was the only change to my diet from almost every other day. 

They must use too much sauce.  Papa John’s…..I’m coming for you.

Today I bought my first ever bottle of TUMs.  I’m not thrilled about the taste but they were fast acting so I have that to be grateful for. 

In other pregnancy news – I am constantly out of breath, which doesn’t help me feel too great about myself since I’ve also packed on some pounds in my midsection…I basically feel like Goldie Hawn in Death Becomes Her, every time I sit down to eat a sweet “treat”.  

But I’ve started to track what I’m eating so I’m hoping that will help me feel better, or at least stop me from eating too much junk.  I think I just am having a hard time because all of my life it's been about losing or maintaining weight and now it's like, "No matter what you do, it's guaranteed that you will gain a pound a week."  Any extra is on me though, so I need to be better.  Is it sad that I've already started to put together my post pregnancy weight loss plan?

Wednesday, February 18, 2015

Baby - it's cold outside.

On Tuesday. we had a real snow day!  I mean, my office closed and everything and Chewy's office encouraged people to work from home if they could.

I love snow, but as I've gotten older it's more in the, "stay indoors watching Netflix and eating" sort of way.  but I did open some doors and take some photos.

Diego in the snow

Our rock wall is covered

Our road compared to the main road when we ran to Target late afternoon.
Speaking of Netflix, Chewy sat down and watched about an hour and some change of North and South with me.  He was really in to it and that made my little, cold heart swell.  Unfortunately he had to actually go and work on some financial analyst stuff so he's going to finish the rest later.  I personally think he got tired of hearing me mumble, "I love you," to Mr. Thornton each time he felt rejected by Margaret.

The last time I was snowed in was on our honeymoon out in the mountains.  I put together a puzzle that day so I decided to try and do the same yesterday.
It turns out that my body really hates sitting in certain positions too long and I think maybe the little dude pushed my hips out of whack because I've been hurting quite a bit around that area.  Thanks a lot little dude.

This morning I had a two hour delay for work, which worked out well since today Chewy left for his first business trip (p.s. it's also his birthday but we'll take care of that this weekend).  Since I had the delay I was able to take him to the airport.  It wasn't too bad once we got out of our driveway.  We've been apart one other time since getting married, and that was youth conference (remind yourself how that went HERE).  I really only have tonight by myself though, because tomorrow is youth night and then I pick him up on Friday so that shouldn't be bad at all.  Others have much longer stints without their spouse around.

I left the airport and was excited at the thought of getting in to work "early" (I don't know what's wrong with me either).  To get from the airport to my office, one would take 64W to 95N to 64W...yup, just thought people not from here would appreciate how crazy that sounds/is.  Point of all of that though is that the first 64W DID NOT MOVE.  I was driving along just fine and then had to slam on the brakes.  I don't know if that's normal for that stretch at 9:40 in the morning or if there was an accident or something, 95N wasn't much better but by the second 64W it wasn't too bad.  I made it in without any injury or really losing my temper.  

Oh - and here's the baby bump photo of the 25th week.  I look fat, which serves me right because I've been eating too much pizza and cookies lately.  Annnnnnd, I'm eating a cookie while taking the picture so that's why my face looks the way it does.


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