Thursday, August 13, 2015

2 Months

I'm a few weeks late - but here are the two month photos.

He weighed in at 13 lbs. 8 oz. 23.75 in. long.  

He drools like crazy now.  Still smiles and laughs in his sleep but he's smiling when awake now.  He sleeps for longer stretches at night (4-7 hours - yay!)

And he has many faces that make me crack up.

He usually looks like he is about to punch someone...that's my boy.

Tuesday, July 7, 2015

Time flies

Guess who is finally a month old?

This guy

I'm a week late with the pictures but honestly, that's pretty good all things considered.  Everything is going well, we love him a lot already.

He weighed in at 11.6 pounds, 22.5 inches long and is in the 90th percentile for head circumference...we knew something was up with that noggin of his.

His likes so far:
His new sunglasses

The changing table (I think it's really the sheets).

And hanging out with his dad in the moby wrap (and mostly being close to either one of us, he isn't a fan of being put down...though for our sanity it happens).

He also likes to stare at the ceiling and whatever is behind me - but he has looked at me a time or two.  He also laughs in his sleep a lot (on account of his mom being so funny...he dreams of the hilarious things I do).  And he has smiled at me at least twice now (legit smiles - not gas ones, though I've seen a million of those).

Also - this past Sunday he received his baby blessing at church.  He got all dressed up.

Then daddy got him in his car seat.  He's really in to Daddy and what he's doing.

And -- our first family photo

Monday, June 15, 2015


So - I had a baby.  Tami was kind enough to text me on Saturday to remind me that I haven't blogged about that.  I've been adjusting to motherhood and working under my very demanding new boss (some people have taken to calling him 'Turtle' because one of the girls at church said I should name by baby Turtle.  I told her maybe as a nickname - and that's what it's become).

Here's the story of how Turtle came into this world.

I was scheduled to be induced on Friday, May 29th.  Originally we had hoped for that Tuesday but there was no room in the Inn so we took Friday.  I had a doctor's appointment on Wednesday, where I was informed that zero progress had been made, I was still not all.  The doctor decided to have me report to the hospital Thursday evening instead for a 'tape'.  I got checked in at the hospital  Wednesday afternoon so I wouldn't have to do it all on Thursday and Chewy scheduled a half day so that we could go to the hospital together.

Thursday morning Chewy decided to go ahead and take the whole day.  I planned on going through my hospital bag and making sure I had everything I needed and cleaning up a little bit before my 4 o'clock appointment.  I was washing dishes, chatting with Chewy when I realized that I was wet.  I thought perhaps I had gotten dishwater on me, but there was too much for that.  I realized it was my mucus plug and cried out, "something's happening!" because when you have zero progress by week 39 of pregnancy you get a little down.  This was something and though I had read that this could happen days before labor, it was something and I was excited.  Then the contractions started.  I texted my doctor and he told me if I had 6 or more in an hour then to come in to his office.  I started a timer.  The contractions were between 3 1/2 to 5 1/2 minutes apart, but I wasn't sure if I was counting them correctly so I went about my morning.  Ate breakfast, took a shower, got ready for the day.  Chewy did the same.  After two hours with well over 6 contractions an hour, Chewy decided he needed to eat some sandwiches...oh and then we decided to go to the doctor.  I just didn't want to be wasting anyone's time if I had miscounted the contractions since I was scheduled to go in that evening anyway.

The doctor checked me and I was up to four.  They admitted me to Labor and Delivery and Chewy and I hung out in the nice L&D room waiting for whatever came next.  My mom showed up around 1 with food for Chewy (none for the hungry pregnant lady).  But Chewy gave me some of his fries.  The contractions continued to intensify until I finally got the epidural around 2 pm. It was - painful - more than the contractions, but after it got going I didn't feel a thing.  Seriously.  I couldn't even move my legs.  The nurses wanted to put me on my side and they had to do most of the work, I would grab on to the side of the bed and try to help but really I wasn't much help.  I hated it.

Time flew the whole day.  I was put into the L&D room probably around 11 and every time I looked at the clock it was an hour later.  After the epidural, two things happened.  One - I threw up.  Luckily Chewy was able to get me something to throw up in.  I had felt nauseous and told Chewy and the nurse heard me and said that some women throw up in delivery and at that moment it was like she had given me permission to throw up, my face got hotter and I KNEW there was no stopping it.

The second thing - I felt myself start to pee.  I tried to stop it but I felt it was pointless given that I couldn't even move my legs, how could I stop myself from peeing?  I figured it wouldn't be a big deal since I've peed about a teaspoon at a time for most of my pregnancy.  I was ashamed and mortified, especially because the nurses had put a pillow between my knees and I knew I was peeing on that pillow.  The pee didn't stop at a teaspoon though, I told Chewy and my mom that I was peeing and that worse, I was peeing on a pillow.  After a second longer I announced that I was still peeing.  Then - it turns out that for some reason my mom thought that would be an appropriate time to take a picture, but she didn't take a picture, she took a video.  I heard her play it back.  She said she didn't realize she was taking a video.  But THEN - she sent said video to my sisters!  I pulled out a whiny "mom!" that I haven't had to use in years and she said, "I didn't know I was taking a video." To which I replied, "but you knew you were sending one!"  When the nurses came in to roll me over to my other side I apologized because I peed.  They said that was okay, but when they pulled back the blanket they said that my water had broken.  I told my mom to text my sisters and tell them I had NOT peed but that my water had broken.  I had read that only 9% of women have their water break naturally so Chewy said, "Welcome to the 9% club."

After that, they lowered my head - I think this is called 'labor down' - it wasn't comfortable but it couldn't have been too uncomfortable because I fell asleep.  Around 7 we started to really push.  The epidural had lessened (they told me it would so I'd feel pressure and know when to push).  I felt pressure all right.  After I would push it hurt so much.  My doctor came in near the end and he said he could tell I was feeling everything.  He gave me a lock anesthetic...which I felt locally.  That HURT.  I continued to push through contractions until finally the baby was out!  You know when people say they feel a rush of relief? I literally felt a rush of relief.  Matt cut the cord and they took the baby to be weighted and inspected.  While I gave 'mini birth' to the placenta (another rush).  Then I was sewed up - which I felt all of that too.

Turtle weighed 9 pounds, 8.4 ounces and was 20.5 inches long.  My doctor said I get to count it as a natural birth.  Chewy said later that he could tell my doctor was upset that I felt so much.  I guess they backed down too much on the epidural - but also, I never hit my "pain" button.  Turns out I don't quite know the difference between pain and pressure - I had assumed it was all normal.  I mean, women on TV scream too.

In all, I was in labor for 12 hours and pushed for one hour.  I think the worse part was the nurse "massaging" my stomach every so often.  I wish I had the epidural then.  I also got uncontrollable shivers - I thought I was going to vomit or die I was shaking so badly.  They gave me an extra blanket and I had gotten it under control but when the nurse came in to push on my stomach again I started to shiver.  It was as if my body knew.  Chewy and I waited to see him before we named him.  We had it down to two options and the one we went with was Nicholas.  And here he is.

and this one is just for fun

Thursday, May 21, 2015

Belly Bully vs. Skadoosh

Chewy has taken to calling me ‘Belly Bully’…just because I happen to push him around with my belly.  I can’t help that it sticks out there and happens to be effective with guiding him where I want him to go. 

The other day I was eating a piece of cake (no judging – it was delicious).  A small piece fell to the ground and I couldn’t find it, neither could Chewy.  I’m at the stage where my reaction to this is, “Well, I’m sure if will get stuck to a sock or something later.”  Yes, I gross myself out.  I’ll be a cleaner person again soon.  Annnyway…so fast forward to a day or maybe an hour later, I’m helping myself to another little piece.  I see a crumb begin its descent from the bottom of the cake to the kitchen floor.  I thought, “not today, crumb.”  I stuck out my belly, redirecting this crumb from its current course to landing on the counter.  Findable, reachable, and overall cleaner.  I picked the crumb up and threw it in the sink.

Chewy had been watching these events.  He asked me if I seriously just belly bullied a piece of cake.  I told him I preferred to think of it as skadooshing the cake.

Needless to say, I've done it at least one more time since this first happened.

Tuesday, May 12, 2015

Baby Update

37 Weeks down - 3 more to go

It's blurry and Chewy is in it - but I hate taking these pictures so this is it.

Things are finally starting to come together too.  I've had a baby shower at work and one with friends and family and I feel really blessed for how generous everyone has been.  I'm pretty sure we have everything we need now (more than we need really, but he'll grow in to the other stuff).  I've got my hospital bag together (I think I have everything), we've got the nursery painted, we are down to two names (middle name already selected) so hopefully we'll have that by the end of the week.  And last night Chewy set up the crib and we arranged the furniture.

The other side of the room isn't ready for viewing

Now I just need to organize everything the way I want it.  We will be getting new siding on the house...probably around the time I come home with the I have to wait to put up wall decor until after they are finished. ....We didn't really think through this whole siding bit, but we need it (I'll try to remember to take pictures of what the siding looks like now).  I'm going to try and get pictures from my baby showers and post those as well.

Monday, May 11, 2015


I realized as I was preparing to write this post that I never wrote about the first food debacle.  A few weeks ago, I started to crave rice krispy treats.  I put it off for a while because 1) I eat too much sugar right now and 2) we had enough sweet stuff in the house.  But finally, one night I had had it with waiting and made some.  I cut a nice big one and headed off to the bedroom with it.  Chewy was in the bathroom as I passed and he asked me a question.  I had been about to take a big bite but stopped myself to answer his question.  As I turned back for that bite - the treat fell from my hand and on to the hallway floor.  Ruined.  Who knows what is on that floor, and the cat always walks down the hall after he uses the liter box so there was no way I was going to eat this treat.  I cried out in pain and grief and picked it up, threw it away in the closet trash can.  Chewy asked what happened and I told him my treat fell.  My eyes filled with tears as saying it aloud made it real.

"Get another one," he suggested.

"It's fine. I'm just going to brush my teeth." I sulked toward the other bathroom.

I guess Chewy heard something in my voice because he popped his head around the door frame, "What's wrong?"

"Nothing." I lacked conviction.

He came to me, saw that I was crying and panicked as husbands do (and should) when their pregnant wife starts crying.  "I'll go get you one." he offered.

I shook my head.

"Just lay down in bed, I'll bring you a good one."

"It's fine I don't need it."  (I'm such a sugar martyr)

Chewy gave me a hug and started to crack jokes.  He made me laugh but sadly, didn't get me to stop crying.  So I was laughing/crying and when he pulled away from the hug I think he may have panicked some more about the state I was in.  I don't know why I was crying so uncontrollably about a rice krispy treat hitting the floor....there was almost an entire pan of them in the kitchen.

I calmed myself down before bedtime, but I didn't go get another treat that night.

OK - so now that you are caught up on that history.  I swore to myself that night that I would not get Foodmotional again.  But then Saturday came around.

We had a busy day, Jartha (my sister Martha and her husband Jeff), came to pain the nursery.  I took their two girls to the "park" (a playground at the church around the corner).  They were really well behaved, but my feet were swelling and it was a struggle to keep them pink instead of blue.  So we went back to the house for the end of the painting and tried to watch a movie.  They left and I was just exhausted. Which I probably would have felt weather or not I had babysat.  I don't really remember much else about the day, but I needed to go to the grocery store, and while there I planned to pick up something for dinner.  Chewy suggested fried chicken, so I got that in my brain.

I arrived to Martin's around 7 p.m. and picked up the items I needed.  I made my way to the deli.  The chicken case was mostly cleared out.  One side was completely empty and washed, the other had gaps where pans had been removed and the sickly remains of the dinner rush stared up at me.  I didn't care, there had to be good chicken somewhere back there, it was only 7.  But no one came.  I waited and waited.  I even checked out what cold chicken they had packed up.  Nothing fit what we needed.

I began to walk away from the case..but I wanted someone (or some thing) to know I was thoroughly annoyed.  I turned and gave the chicken case the stink face.  You know the one, I just posted about it and how I was going to try and not do that anymore....This one.

I hope that chicken case got the message and sent it along to the employees hiding somewhere in the back shirking their customer service responsibilities to hungry pregnant women...

Before I even got to the check out I had consoled myself...I would go to Hardee's and get an eight piece and with that they would have the oh-so-delicious biscuits.  To get there is kind of a pain though.  I had to drive past it and couldn't make a U-turn at the first or second light, I had to drive down a ways before I could U-turn.  Then I pull in...I drive up to the menu outside and all I see are burgers.  The voice came over the loudspeaker asking if I wanted to try something and I asked, "Do you still sell fried chicken?"

"No, we don't sell fried chicken anymore."

In my head - "Then what is the point of you?"*  If I wanted Carl's Jr. I would move out West.

The lady continues, "we have chicken strips though." P.S. when you want fried chicken, that LOOKS like chicken, you are not in the mood for strips that have too much breading on them.  I told her never mind and drove off.  But I hoped that no one inside could see me because I could already feel my face contorting into 'pathetic sob mode'.

In fact - I cried all the way home.  I sat in the car once arriving home and cried.  I texted Mart because I was embarrassed but I had to talk to someone about it and I felt like I had cried too much recently in front of Chewy.

I finally got myself together and went into the house.  I put the groceries away and walked past Chewy, "no chicken tonight" I said.

He followed me to the room where I threw myself on the bed. "Is that because you changed your mind?"

"No." Enter stage left, foodmotional breakdown.  I explained everything to him.  He said he'd find me chicken somewhere, but I really only like Ukrop's chicken (sold at pathetic Martin's) and Hardee's.  He offered to order pizza but for once, that didn't sound good to me.  So I did the food martyr again and said I was just going to go to bed.  I didn't though, I ended up just eating peanut butter crackers.

It's so hard being pregnant and having food desires you are unable to satisfy.

Wednesday, April 29, 2015

Catholic Guilt and the Ugly Face Phenomenon

As part of the baby preparations, I emptied out my cedar/memory chest so we could move it out of the nursery.  I came across a million scrapbooks and journals.  On the first page of the first journal I opened it seemed like a confession.  I was 11 years old.  Martha threw something at Kathryn, I dropped a bottle of salad dressing into a basket of clean laundry (which I washed again), I had a spelling test and I made a bunch of mistakes.  I thought, "Man, I was hard on myself."

Then later I opened a seminary journal, I was 17 years old.  I expected to find my thoughts on whatever scripture we had been studying but as I opened it to the first page I read, "I forgot to say my prayers this morning."  I always joke with people that I'm half catholic because my mom used to be catholic.  I think this guilt I have displayed all through my life is further proof of that.  Catholic guilt is hereditary despite what Chewy may say.

So I'm 35 weeks pregnant now.  I can tell you that my back hurts no matter what I do, I pee more, I have begun to feel contractions from time to time (apparently normal), but even with all this I'm scared for the baby to actually come.  I'll be fine, I know, everyone has told me I'll do great and not to stress, but how do you not stress about suddenly being responsible for a little life that will be completely dependent on you?  Or for labor pain- yeah, how do you not stress about that?

Anyway, the emotions still run high, I am more cranky than before though my goal this week has been to be better about road rage.  Here's why.  Last Saturday, Chewy and I were at BJs.  It was cold and rainy and so he went to get the car and I stood in the lobby - people watching.  An employee was out there in the cold and rain collecting carts and bringing them inside.  He was coming down a hill in the parking lot with a whole line of carts.  A woman in an SUV starts backing out of her spot.  He waves his arm in the air to get her attention so she will stop.  She does, and then I watch as she turns toward the store watching the guy with the carts go by.  She is talking to her passenger, hands gesturing in anger and indignation and a face all like:

And of course my face went

and I thought, what an ugly face to make. Is that what I look like when I'm cranky on the road?  Therefore, I resolved to be better about my attitude on the road (and to not use my ugly face - especially when judging people for using theirs).  It's been really hard this week but I think I've done alright.  I've hit traffic every morning and I keep telling myself to keep calm and listen to my audiobook.


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