Wednesday, September 2, 2015

A Stomach Like A Rat

Chewy's nickname has changed to Templeton.  Yes, he's now been named after the rat from Charlotte's Web.  It started one day when he decided to mix every type of cereal we had in a bowl and then sprinkle flax seed on top.  The first time he did this I watched in horror.  I'm the 32 year old woman who still doesn't like her food to touch. He mixes a lot of food actually and in this instance I guess opposites attract.

So I began to call him Templeton and I'll sing, "Smorgasbord, smorgasbord" when he's 'creating' in the kitchen.  Sometimes I think he opens the fridge, sees a bunch of leftovers and he's all...
And then he's...

His latest concoction came about because he made the grave mistake of messing up my taco meat.  He thought it would be great to add some Paprika to the meat - however, I apparently made the graver mistake of purchasing SMOKED paprika (so therefore I suppose the fault lies with me).  That stuff is potent.  I wasn't a fan of the tacos we were eating and I blamed the Target brand seasoning I had bought until he fessed up.  For his punishment I consigned him to eat taco leftovers all the days of his life the week.

So as he was making a grilled cheese sandwich he decided to put taco meat in the middle.

Insert my usual reaction to his food here (ew, gross!)  He says they are delicious and has already had them many times.

Today at lunch I told him he should name them.  

Templeton: What, like Chad?

Me: No, like how grilled cheese sandwiches are named grilled cheese sandwiches, just something more creative for those.

Templeton: The best grilled cheese sandwich - ever

('ever' said like this)

Then Templeton asked me what the best of something was and I said, "Babe Ruth?" Which got us on a discussion of whether or not Babe was still the best and I remembered a baseball player from the 90's, that may have been better.  Toby McGuire or something.

Templeton: (Laugh) Spiderman? Do you mean Mark McGuire? The guy all roided up?

Me: I don't remember that part but yeah.

Templeton: It was Mark. (shakes head) Toby McGuire.

Me: Toby McGuire it is.
*Typing it in on my phone as a possible name.

Me: OH! Who's that actor that you made the rap about?* The guy from Fargo.

Templeton: William H. Macy?

Me: That's the one.

Introducing to the world 

 The William H. Macy

I actually got up the nerve to try some of it today.  A tiny bit.  I couldn't stop laughing as the little chunk approached my mouth - I laughed out of fear more than anything.  But I survived (for now) and survey says, "it's not terrible."

Stay tuned for more meals from Templeton's Trough.  

*Templeton has a rap for William H. Macy.  When it's done we hope to achieve YouTube fame and enough money to live out retirement comfortably.  

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