Saturday, July 3, 2010

Who gave him carrots?*


Last night I babysat my two nephews. I got there in the early afternoon, so we were playing around but hadn't eaten dinner yet. Tommy decided that he wanted to watch Polar Express so he got in his bed, said he needed a blanket and asked for milk and a candy bar (he always asks me for that).
Me: How about just milk?
Tommy: Okay, I just need milk and a peppermint patty.
Me: Will you still eat your dinner?
Tommy: Yes.
Me: (I wasn't born yesterday) Pinky swear it (but I am immature: I stuck out my pinky).
Tommy: (Smiles and pulls my pinky).
Me: No, do your pinky like this and pinky swear to eat your dinner.
Tommy: (still smiling) I just want milk.
So I go get him the milk and when I come back and see him looking all cozy and in a nap-like position I asked him if he had already taken a nap today (my thought was that it was too late in the game to take a nap). He said he had and I said, "So you won't fall asleep?"
Tommy: Yes.
Me: So you will fall asleep?
Tommy: No. (and in his head probably thinking, "Give me the milk woman!")

So...surprise, Tommy fell asleep. I made them dinner and tried to get Jacob to eat it. Finally he did when I said he could take his plate out to the back patio and eat while playing with his trains. When he brought it back in I could see that he hadn't eaten much of it.

Jacob: Can you put my food in there (points to the trash can)
Me: How about we put it on the table in case you want more later, just to nibble
Jacob: Okay, yeah I might want more
Me: Yeah, just in case.
Jacob: (who had been closing the door, stops, opens it back up) I'm tired of eating Jess.
Great aspirations
Tommy: Maybe if I grow up I'll have a big poo-poo.

Tommy telling me about the "big black birdies" (planes) at the aviation museum.

Tommy: You're gonna be a big black birdie one day. But the big black birdies are old and don't fly anymore.
Me: Is that why I'm going to be a big black birdie? Because I'm old and don't fly?
Tommy: No, you'll be a big black birdie and won't fly
Me: Cause I'm old?
Tommy: yeah.
And here is the crowning jewel of the evening, the amount of laughing involved has begun my six pack.

Jacob was pretending to be a baby after dinner and Tommy comes up and covers him, being careful not to cover Jacob's face saying, "There you go." He patted him. Jacob kept insisting he was a boy baby (they have a baby sister, it's probably important to point that out).

Then Jacob started to cry and I asked him what he needed.

Jacob: Milk, I need milk.

Tommy slowly starts to lift up his shirt: Here you go Jake, here you go. Here's some milk. (and started to go towards him).

It took me a second to figure out what was happening, and then I started to laugh, "No, Tommy, you don't have to do that." I went to get milk as quickly as I could but the whole time I could hear Tommy saying, "Here's some milk Jake" and couldn't stop laughing.

In the meantime, here is my brother-in-law Ben. last week he was working out in the yard all day with my dad putting up a play set.
What's that? You didn't know catch that?? Yeah...that's unfortunate.


Martha said...

Thanks for the ROFL!!

(word verification: refusin)

Sarah said...

oh my gosh, that made me laugh! "Here's some milk Jake" ha ha ha ha

Vanessa said...

Hahahaha! Oh my. Being an aunt, it is such a treat. & kids do say the craziest things!


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