Six Months of Book Reviews.

When I decided to not read 50 books this year I told myself that I would still do a monthly update on the books I was reading.  Since it's now July I thought I would at least do a review of the first half of the year. So - here are the books I read and whether or not I think they're any good. (in no particular order)

The Highest In Us by Truman Madsen - you want a deep read where half the time you're not sure you understand the words much less the idea behind them and yet at the end of each section your like, "I get it!"?  Read this book.  Madsen is an extremely intelligent man and while reading this book I had a dozen light bulb moments...I love light bulb moments.

Born For Love by Maia Szalavitz & Bruce D.  Perry - I will admit - I bought this book last year after a breakup.  It did not help "heal my wounds" or anything but I found it a very interesting read.  There are some good theories and interesting research.  This book made me evaluate the way I treat people and the need for empathy in our lives.  Of course - this book also like to do the slippery slope where if this happens, then this will happen, and then our world will end - maybe not that dramatic in words, but you get the idea.  But that happens sometimes with books like this - they are trying to drive their point home.  Overall though - a very good read.

The Remarkable Soul of a Woman by Dieter F. Uchtdorf - I bought this book for my mom for Mother's Day.  This is what we would call a super quick read.  But it was good.  I love how Uchtdorf always seems to focus on how great women are and on how they tend to forget this.

Prepare Now for the Temple by Brittany Mangus - I bought this book for a friend who is going to be going through the temple later this year and I thought I should read it before I really recommended it.  It was helpful (maybe more so to my friend who hasn't been there before) but it was definitely geared towards young women...from Utah....who plan to get married by the time they are 19.  It talked a lot about how preparing for the temple and preparing for your wedding should be two different events.  No problema for us east coast girls.  But the basic information was still good and helpful.

The A.B.C. Murders by Agatha Christie - Yes, I'm still reading Agatha here and there.  She's incredible, just when I think I've figured it out she puts a legit twist in it.  How does she keep doing that?

The Hobbit by J.R.R. Tolkien - Ryan bought me this book for either my birthday or Christmas and since there is a movie coming out this year (or already came out? I'm not with the program) I decided to read it first thing.  It was hard for me to get in to, I mean, I like Lord of the Rings and all, but I couldn't read the book.  But as with most good books that start off slow, there was a point I hit where I wanted to just keep reading to find out what was going to happen.  It was also nice to actually know some of the characters in the story because of the movies.  Overall - I liked this one.

All These Things I've Done by Gabrielle Zevin - Sometimes I go to physical location of Barnes and Noble just to find a new book I wouldn't have found otherwise.  This was one of them and it was one of them and it didn't disappoint (like some of them I've gotten before - we'll get to them later I'm sure).  It is a very interesting concept.  The main character is the child of a chocolate guru who was murdered when she was a child.  Chocolate has long since been prohibited by the government for sale within the US (they can still sell to other countries) and that makes her family on the wrong side of the law.  It was an interesting look into how the government can sometimes decide what is right and what is wrong and to see how they things can change over time (i.e. there is mention of how the government used to restrict alcohol and how one day chocolate won't be the bad guy, it will be something else).  I'm not sure how I feel about the very end of the book - jury is still out on that one, but the rest of it was enjoyable.

Living Waters by Brent L. Top - I read this book so long ago I barely remember the highlights.  But I do remember that I liked it.  There was a chapter devoted to hypocrites and it really made me question myself and look inward to see what my motives are for the things I do. 

That's it for 2012 so far - My goal this year was 16 - which seems so tiny compared to last year's.  But we are half way through the year and I have halfway to my goal (and I still enjoy reading - couldn't say the same last year as I was scrambling to read all the Harry Potters).  Hope you enjoyed.

Feelings. Nothing more than feelings*

Some days are harder than others. Some days you feel pain more acutely or old wounds are raw (ladies, let’s admit it, some days you are just emotional for no apparent reason). That's been the past week or so - I cried when I saw "Brave", I cried when I thought about my life in the next year or so, I got angry when I was asked on a date, etc., etc., etc.  I wish it wasn't that way because I'm the type of person who just wants to be okay all the time. I'm also the type of person who feels like I have to fix everything myself, so...that kind of makes things suck more (I know I don’t have to – I’ve got that half of the battle down). Lately I've been trying to root certain things out of my life and I've been trying to keep the "Master Gardener" on call for help.


A few months ago, as some of you recall, I was working in my yard. I had some deep rooted plants that were a pain to get out. Sweat dripped down my face, I grew light headed, and I even had help at points from a friend to try and dig up these plants (roots and all). I grew impatient at times I hacked away with the shovel, used a hand saw to try and tear it down, and eventually, we got it out.

I find that my emotions are the same. Some of them are deep rooted, entwined with months of habit, some of them have slowly snuck up on me and I didn't realize they were there until I was faced with something. I've been really angry, I kind of noticed this when I was swinging a shovel at a baby tree with all I had. That's neither here nor there - the point is, I've realized that I am angry. Part of me thinks I need to hold on to the anger to get other emotions in check. The other part of me knows I need to let go of it. I get impatient with myself, I want to change something about me and then I think it should be as easy as making the decision, but lasting change never comes that easily. The other night I was upset because I'm not "there" yet, I'm not where I want to be. Then I thought, "but that's ok". I'm not there yet, but that's ok.

I liked working in my yard, it was hard and I almost passed out a few times from overexertion, it was long and I lost patience a few times, but I stayed with it and the yard looked good afterwards. I know that’s how it will be with the work I’m doing on myself.

But the changes in the yard were short lived. I did all of that work and now the weeds are returning, the grass needs to be mowed, and the stupid stray cat is using my mulch for a litter box. It took a lot of work upfront and it takes more work for the upkeep. I think I'm personally the same. It's going to take a lot of work, and I'm going to be pretty darn proud of it for a while, but if I don't remember the upkeep I'll end up back where I started.

That was probably a really strange way to tell you how I feel and how I'm trying to work through it. But I've always enjoyed metaphors.

I'm just trying to be a better person and at times I get confused on the best way to do it. Sometimes I feel like I'm taking steps forwards and backwards at the same time. Ahead a little in this area but it cost a few steps back in another area. I know it will all balance out in the end, and that's what I need to remember, I need to have patience that sometimes it hurts when the changes are being made, but I’ll be the better for them in the end.

My mom says the pads you gave me weren't enough.*

Last night we went to a Richmond Raiders Indoor Football game for FHE.  One of the members of our ward at church is on the team and he snagged us all free tickets (and even if they weren't free- they were only $10 - so who's in for next season!?)

Here are some photos - sorry in advance if the picture quality is bad - I've lost my camera (again).  I'm going to put out an APB on it and hopefully it will show up.

They play downtown in the Coliseum.  Our team is blue.

As expected - Nicole (the horse gambling junkie) had no problem jumping right in to the football fan persona.  She was cheering even as our own guy was slammed into the wall and then she yelled out, "You'll be waking up next Saturday!" Or something like that. 



Can I just say that I want one of these - it's a remote controlled blimp that drops give aways on the crowd (light ones that don't hurt - I know, I was hit on the head with a bracelet)...who wouldn't want a mini version of this in their house to bring them snacks and such


In arena football, if the ball is hit into the stadium (which happens quite a bit because the field is a lot smaller than a regular football field) whoever catches it gets to keep it.  There was one guy who caught three, one man who tripped over his girlfriend's legs as he dove for the ball, a small group of children who turned Lord of the Flies for one, and many others.

I mostly got distracted by these guys:

They kind of made me think of this guy:

Near the end of the game we all stood up and were cheering as loudly as we could because the other team had the ball and we wanted to distract them with noise.  In addition to whooping and hollering, I started to yell for Charlie.  I screamed a few times, "You're a good man, Charlie Brown!"

The cheering must have worked because we won!  Actually it was probably some good defense work on the part of #11 not #31.  None of us liked #31 because he was one of those hot heads who thinks he's the star of the show (you know the type).  He threw his arms around and pushed other people a lot when something didn't go right.  At one point #11 and #31 were both around to get an interception - for a second they both ran down the field together, both holding on to the ball and then #31 clearly yanked it out of #11's hands.  He ran down the field and made a touchdown that didn't count.  Good job #31 - way to be a team player.

Anyway - the crowd jumped on to the field afterwards to congratulate the team.

Thus ends my Monday Night Adventure.

Drama, drama, drama*

I always seem to come up with book titles, but have no IDEA what to put inside of it!

A few months ago I started to write my autobiography, Still in the Room: the life story of the sixth child.  I lost interest in that.  I'm not big on writing about myself.  In fact, in all of my English classes, I did the worst with writing anything that I wasn't allowed to stretch the truth on.  I hated writing about myself, and the runner up was writing about people I knew.  I felt too sappy, too sentimental, and then there was the  worry that I remembered things wrong. 

My point - if there is such a thing when I'm writing - is that I came up with another title a few weeks ago.  The Black and White Rainbow.  Sounds deep, no?  It could be about anything.  I pitched the title to two women at work and one immediately went off on how it could be about politics in our country and....that's where I stopped understanding where she was going with it.  But I think it could be about whatever the reader thinks it is about.  Everything could be a super deep metaphor for something else.  Because what else would a black and white rainbow be but a metaphor for anything and everything?  The back would not have a synopsis, it would simply say, "Yes, this book is about that! Buy it now!".  Colbert can do something like that, so can I. 

Other possible titles include:

Don't Eat My Cheese (a book about roommates)
Growing up Donbro (used to be my autobiography title until Still in the Room came to mind)

 

Anyway - I have the same problem with blogs.  My blogs include:

*Bottom of the Barrel - a blog on dating
*Come Ye to the Waters - my more spiritual blog (title changes every year to go with the theme)
*The Steno Pad - writing blog that I never update anymore
*Stalking Jimothy - memoirs of two stalkers (Elaina and I co write this one - but since Jim, Elaina and are all spread out...this one doesn't get written in much anymore).

I guess I like coming up with titles...also, I feel like my main blog is random enough.  But lately I've been wondering if I should streamline them.  Would it make my life easier? Would I lose readers if I went off on spiritual diatribes or dating theories?  Do I write too much - or too little?

I'll be honest, about a month ago I was about ready to throw in the towel and just stop blogging.  I had no desire whatsoever to do it.  I know now that I may have been in a self-induced depressive state.  I've since come out of that state and all I want to do is blog...so now I am back to how I can make my blog better - cause I am going to be honest with all of you who have made it through to this line in the post - I want to be a well known blogger.  Does one get there by giving themselves a nickname and a cartoon profile picture?  I know some people have a topic - they have an incurable disease (I can't compete with that - but I AM a hypochondriac), they dress up in costume and wave to their kid's bus every morning for six years and blog each costume, there's the snarky mom blog network (again, can't compete), there are crafty, home improvement, etc.

I don't have any of that....or maybe I have a little bit of some of those. 

Anyway - so I'm reaching out to anyone who still reads this -

1. Should I go ahead and just merge all my blogs and you just deal with some posts not having blog bucks and being about dating and spiritual stuff or should I keep them separate so if you don't want to bother with stuff you don't have to read it?
2. Do you know of a blogging niche I could fit in to?? I need to feel a part of something.

That's all folks.*

Hairy legs are your only link to reality*

Last week I got invited to go to the horse races for $2....I had never been to horse races and $2 sounded like a good price for a new experience.

It took us a while to get out to Colonial Downs, we actually passed it the first time and saw a deer.  Our driver, Two Month Tyler (he's here for a two month internship), thought it would be nice to strike up a conversation with the deer.  The way the deer stared at Tyler almost convinced me he knew what was being said.

I must still be in my tourist mode from my Yankee trip because I had no qualms about whipping out my camera and photo documenting the experience.  When we got there we walked right up to what we thought was the track.  I'm going to be honest with you, we had a group of 10 and not one of us knew what was going on.  There were people on horses and from there we tried to figure things out.  Why didn't the horses have numbers? Why were the jockeys so old...and smoking?

When would the race begin? Why were people sitting so far away on the bleachers?  Eventually we figured out that on the huge board with a gazillion factoids, had one that showed how much longer until the next race.  There was the sound of a trumpet and then horses with numbers and young jockey's entered the track.  Then we waited another seven minutes or so before the actual race - which was not on the area we thought was the track - the track was on some grass further away. 

In all honesty - the race was really boring.  They took off and then we couldn't even really see them for a while.  Then they came back around and crossed the finish...donezo until the next race....20 minutes later.  I suppose if I was a gambling woman I wouldn't mind the 20 minute wait because it would give me time to place my bet, but I don't gamble.  We took pictures in the meantime...

The Zamboni of race tracks

Little known fact (could be well known) the gates are brought in for the start off and then removed.

Kami, Jessie, and Two Month Tyler

We finally figure out that part of that giant board showed the top four horses - nifty for when you can't see them

One girl in our group decided to give the whole experience a try.  But she didn't want to go in blindly.  She talked up strangers to find out what things were.  Within two races she was talking like she came to the races every week.  We tried to tell her that she may have a problem, but she said she could quit at any time and since people usually mean it when they say that ....we let it go.

She did win $2.50 and we did document it as much as we could on camera. 

The winning ticket

The winning horse

The payoff

So here's the math:

$2 (for her first bet that she lost)

$2 (for another bet that she tried something new and won)

$.10 (for something - I can't remember what she called it)

$.50 (for something else I can't remember)

Total spent: $4.60

Total won: $2.50

Profit for Nicole: -$2.10

See kids - Gambling doesn't pay.

Here's what I learned:

1. Horse races are more fun when you pick a horse you want to win
2. They are even more fun when your friend has put down money on a horse
3. Someone needs to babysit Nicole if we ever go again (every time I turned around she was talking to another stranger)
4. Horse races are like high school football games - go with a group of friends if you really want to have fun - cause the action on the field won't be that good.

It didn't take much for Two Month Tyler to get us to leave the races.  The moment he mentioned getting ice cream I was on board.  So we left and piled into the cars, unsure of where there was an ice cream joint on the way back to our meeting place.  But as we came out onto one of the main roads we spotted a Dairy Queen.  Somehow the second car, which was behind us, totally passed the DQ.  Jeremy (another intern) asked someone with a smart phone to send him our location.  None of us knew how to do that.  So I took a picture of the Dairy Queen and sent it to Kami as a joke:

They eventually found us and showed us how to do it - it's through Google Maps or something like that...the things these young whippersnappers teach me about my phone - craziness. 



It puts it in a text and you can send them where you are and they can use Google Maps to get directions.

I got a Sundae with marshmallow and peanut butter (in case you are interested) - my recommendation - don't get the marshmallow.  Leave it as peanut butter and it will not disappoint. 

I don't do backstory, however I am becoming very interested in yours.*

This week I decided it was time to get back in to running.  Well...I decided it a few weeks ago when I decided to attempt the half marathon again.  I figured if I got in to it early enough then I would somehow find myself prepared for 13 grueling miles.  It might work right?

Anyway, so yesterday morning I made myself go running.  It wasn't so bad.  I decided I would just do two miles and ease myself back in to things.  The weather was beautiful, it wasn't too hot and there was a nice breeze.  You couldn't ask for better weather to motivate you to just keep going.  I planned to go running this morning because of scheduling issues, but somehow ended up sleeping in...I don't know how that crazy stuff happens.  So I planned it out in my head during work.  I'd get home and go running at 5:30, doing three miles that would get me back by 6 (I don't know why I'm so optimistic about my time) and that would leave plenty of time to shower and get ready for Institute at 7.

There was only one thing I didn't take in to account (aside from the fact that I need to work my way back to a ten minute mile), the weather.  So here's my advice.  If you come home from work and your brand new sunflowers go from being these vibrant, beautiful buds of happiness to look like this:

Then you probably shouldn't go running.  It's like a canary in mine - if the bird drops dead you should probably get out.  If you plants that looked alive when you left for work look like they'll barely make it through the night - don't stay outside.  

I know this now.  This afternoon I ignored it. I told myself I would just do two miles today cause of the heat, but when I hit the turn around point I felt fine so I decided to go with three miles, which in theory was just adding a half mile.  I think it was at two miles that I wished I had just stuck with two miles in the first place...I pictured one of those signs in my head where it says, "If you lived here you'd be home" but it said "if you made good choices you'd be home right now."  So I suffered through the last mile and tried to find the balance of thinking I was going to pass out and thinking it was all in my head.  But I made it home - with barely enough time to get in the shower and eat and get to institute...and the whole time I felt like I was going through menopause.

I hope that I can remember this and make myself get up early next time I want to go running, probably Thursday...we'll see how it goes.

If I pretend I have it, then I don't*

I am getting so far behind on entries! Sorry! I just didn't want to post all my New England posts all at once and run the risk of overwhelming all three of you who read.

Last Saturday we had a ward river trip.  I don't usually do ward activities, or rivers, or anything like that.  A few weeks ago when I bought a bathing suit for the first time in - ever, I was all set to make myself go.  Then the week of, I kept thinking about not going.  My friend, Vivienne, texted me on Friday to see if I was going and so I felt obligated to go.  Later in conversation, I found out that she didn't really want to go but when I texted back saying that I would she decided that she would make herself go.  I thought it was funny how we tricked each other into going without meaning to.

So Saturday morning, Kami, Vivienne, and I met over at "the boys" house so we could carpool/caravan.  Christian and Chris were for sure coming and Chris' friend from DC was supposed to and then we talked their roommate, Nick into coming.  So we ended up taking two cars.  We all pile in and it's decided that my car will lead the way, except that NO ONE knows where they are going.  We pull up the Facebook page for the activity and figure we'll use the directions on there.  The directions started out by saying, "Take 360".  For non-Virginians, 360 is all over the place.  I could take 95 South and drive for awhile to get on there or I could take 95 north to 295 and get on there, or (as the GPS ended up taking us eventually) I could take 95 south to 64 east.  I couldn't understand why they didn't just make the directions to start at the church building since that's where the carpool was coming from...oh well.  We made it after a while and that's what counts.

We were some of the first people there so we took a walk down the world's longest dock to where the boat was and sat on the dock for a while talking.

  Some people came out to swim and I got some action shots of them.

Then "my group" started talking about Kayaking - I'm fearful of kayaking because then I'd be solo.  Wanting to branch out and not just sit around for the whole activity, I asked Nick how he was with canoes and when he said he was good with them I asked if he would come with me.  So we went up to get the canoe, where I almost killed Nick about 3 times with the canoe carrier thingy.

Then I went in and changed into my bathing suit and took forever to come out of the bedroom where I was hiding, talking to three girls.  I finally just did it and it took some time to get comfortable, but I finally did. 

Getting in and out of a canoe has got to be on my top ten list of most terrifying things to do.  I finally got in and Nick informs me that I am backwards.  I for some reason thought you faced the other person in a canoe...I ignored that for a second and he mentioned it again.  HE ACTUALLY EXPECTED ME TO TURN AROUND! Had he not realized how hard it was for me to get in in the first place?!  So I cautiously turned around and we got going.

Nick and I just met about a week ago when I gave Christian a ride home from the airport.  In total before this canoeing experience we have probably spent no more than 6 hours in a room together.  Now here we were, alone on the river with me freaking out in the front that we might tip.  Add that to me being super weird about which life jacket to wear and wearing it before we even set foot on the dock.  Then...also add to that, that when we got to the dock and some friends saw that I was going to go out they stared in amazement and asked me, "But what about the sharks?", "I hear sharks are adaptable to fresh water", "What about alligators."  I told them all to shut up - I didn't need any help changing my mind.  (P.S. these were all in good fun - never at any point during this activity did I feel emotionally abused or attacked).

Then I started to talk about dry drowning, and how I don't like the plants on the riverbank, they cause me great anxiety.  Then I told Nick that most people don't get to know these strange things about me right away.  He said that I had certainly given him a lot to think about...and a lot to be afraid of (sign up one more for a fear of dry drowning).  We eventually came back in and then some of us played Rock Band, then I got pulled into an epic ping pong match, then I talked to some friends about Frisbee and relationships, then I had a rematch of ping pong.  Then when I was ready to change back into my normal clothes Nick told me that if I had said I wanted to go back out on to the canoe he would have come with me.  To the canoe!

I thought since I had done it once I would be more relaxed....I thought wrong.

We went to the other side of the river and into the river weeds...I told Nick that it wasn't really the weeds - it's what might be in the weeds and that if anything grabbed my paddle I was just going to let it go, but by that point we'd pretty much be screwed.  I wouldn't want to rock the canoe by fighting something off and if we didn't have the paddles we weren't going anywhere...I may or may not have screamed once when the boat hit some plants - but Nick has promised not to tell anyone. 

We ate dinner when we got back and then our little group headed back to Richmond.  We were only planning on staying for maybe an hour or so, but we ended up staying until the activity ended at 8 pm.  I think that would mean the activity was a big success!

I even have a little souvenir of the adventure - Christian's fingerprints in suntan lotion. I should probably clean those off.

I find that smuggling is the life for me, and would be delighted tokill your friend the maggot!*

So in case you missed it, I went to six states in basically two days.

• Boston (Friday - we flew in there)
• Rhode Island (Friday)
• Connecticut (Friday)
• Vermont (Saturday)
• New Hampshire (Saturday)
• Maine (Saturday)
• Boston (Sunday and Monday - and Friday morning)

Kami and I both went collecting things.  I was collecting shot glasses for the work collection

 and Kami was collecting stickers from each state (sometimes a few from each) for a water bottle.

I had all of my shot glasses before we even got to Boston - since I had been to Boston before (didn't stop me from grabbing a Red Sox glass).  Here's the final lineup.

All-in-all I think it was a great trip.  Props to G-Sauce for orchestrating it all.  G wrote blog posts about the trip too - hers included more about tips for travelers whereas mine just told you how crazy things were (cause I do crazy better than informational) Check out her posts at http://50statesin2011.blogspot.com/

If you love me enough to sell your tickets, I love you enough not to let you. *

Day two of Boston:

It was more like what I knew of Boston, it was mostly the things I've seen before except it was Memorial Day so it was more crowded and it was warm instead of freezing cold.  We had continental breakfast so we didn't hunt down the pink breakfast diner from last time. 

We mastered the T (aka metro, subway, etc.)

We went to Harvard:

 Then we did the Freedom Trail.  Cheers, Boston Common, etc.

Then we went to the um, Prudential building(?? A very tall building in Boston) and went to the top floor to "eat" - mostly we went to see the view. 

Fenway Park from 52 stories up

There are lighthouses on the bridge :) they aren't real ones...

I grabbed a grilled cheese and we may our way back to the hotel to our luggage (which they kindly held for us even though we checked out) and then it was back to the airport and Virginia!