I'm not going to waste my time arguing with a man who's lining up to be a hot lunch.*

*Playing Rocky Theme Music*

Meet Franco...he's an American Squirrel Gladiator. He excels in paw to paw combat and is known to have a mean buck tooth bite. Best known for his speed and agility, Franco has come head to head against some of the greatest Squirrel Contenders of his time, such as Cuckslot Anuts, Awal Nut, and even The Flying Torpedo.

Franco is about to meet Chubbers Horatio Umberto Bell. He may not be a gladiator, but he can climb his ten foot kennel wall to freedom and he's a 2 time champion of the National Canine Jumper Competition. Trained to attack hair dryers and bark at storm doors opening Chubbers is best known for shaking his nub and seeing eye to eye to people (literally). His M.O.? Taking one of his K-9 teeth and surgically slicing his opponents down the middle to remove their inner squeaker. Rare contenders have survived a head-to-head.

Who will win in this epic battle?

It's beast against slightly smaller beast!

Sadly there are no more photos of the fight. Just know that it was not, I repeat not, a battle to the death as originally anticipated. Both are still living, though Franco is slightly beaten. Since then the two have overcome their differences and Franco is often seen taking a ride between the friendly fangs of Chubbers. All in all...The "Good Purchase" award goes to Chubbers' Mom (ahem...that's me).