Friday, May 7, 2010

Good morning! You're about to call in sick.*

The only bad things about vacation are needing a vacation from your vacation and the dreaded day that you return to work. I got to work on Tuesday to find tons of things on my desk and 88 e-mails in my inbox. Gag me.

I was just off to a rough start this week and it only got better (she says with obvious sarcasm). I thought that Tuesday was the worst because it was the first day back from vacation. At this point, I can barely remember what was wrong with Tuesday. I do remember one good thing, my roommate, Elaina, invited me to come eat lunch with her at work (free lunch!). When I got there she had these for me...

I almost started to cry...mostly because I felt threatened. Just kidding.

Wednesday might have actually been a good day, with the exception that my tooth on my left side is trying to kill me. I just went to the dentist, how did they not notice the torrential storm about to break loose in my nerves?

Thursday (yesterday) there were personal problems up the wazoo. Topped with an ever growing list of "projects", most of which need to be done by Friday (oh today). I reverted to high school Jessica, who was a jerk and I said something to a friend that I deeply regret. Luckily this friend does the rubber/glue thing, and it bounced off him and the regret is just sticking to me. I left the office two or three times to collect myself. The last time was after I filled out a work order to have an office wall fixed, when I hit send the Internet told me I timed out and therefore everything I had written was lost. I put my hands on my face and said in the most pitiful voice because I couldn't muster anything stronger, "Are you freaking kidding me?" My co-worker told me straight up to leave my desk, go sit in front of the waterfall, or out to the pond, go for a walk, just get away from the desk. She's a little blessing she is. So I ended up walking around the building trying to work through anger and frustration and defeat. The day got progressively better though. The missionaries came over to my house and fed me spiritually, I got into a spiritual discussion with the friend who I wounded that morning and I went to bed in a relatively in a good mood.

This morning I decided it was going to be a good day because, well, it's Friday, how can it not be? I get ready, I'm feeling good. I go out to my car, start the engine, put my hand on the gear shifter and put it in to reverse. Wait...resistance. Reverse! ...nothing. I said my favorite phrase for this week (referenced above, "are you freaking kidding me?"). I go inside and tell Elaina about it, she comes out to see if it's like the dancing frog* but no, it still won't work. I call my dad and he runs through the list of all the things you need to do before you can put your car in reverse and asks at least three times, "It's still not coming out of park?" it's not, because my car is mad at me for some reason and has decided that I haven't had a rough enough week.

So Dad comes to the rescue (he is getting really good at this) and takes a look at the car. He reads and fiddles while I Google solutions and I am putting my money on the Solenoids...what a solenoid is I know not.

I do know that for how small it is, it doesn't plan on being inexpensive for me.

To sum up my week:

*My car and my mouth want to suck all the money from my bank account.

*I am a jerk

*My job is determined to send me to an early grave

*I am a cranky pants who is constantly on the verge of crying this week

*My dad is great

*My friends are forgiving

*My roommates are awesome

*Missionaries are the coolest and I love my church

*I HAVE a job

Coming trip to Ohio!


Sarah said...

is your title a Jim Gaffigan quote?

G Sauce said...

I say this to you and your crappy week. The sun will come out tomorrow!

Amber Lanae- said...

*Jim Gaffigan!!!

I only know this because I have this amazing roommate who introduces me to all these amazing things. I'm pretty sure that this same roommate is one of the best people I know. AND EVEN MORE SURE that a rainbow is lurking on the horizon.

Katie H said...

Jim Gaffigan!!! I love him. I quote that sketch all the time. :)

Elaina said...

jim gaffigan. i win. i win!!!

Joanna and Ben said...

I love you Jess, sorry that your car is afraid of his behind. One day he'll feel comfortable to back that thang up. Anyway, the week after vacation is always hard. I hope that things get better


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